So...

Well, the job situation may have effected me more than I thought.

I have fallen back in my old habits, though not entirely. That combined with recent knee trouble has made things difficult for me to get things done.

I, however, am trying to get my mind back on track and my head back in the game.

The thing about failure is that it is not failure if you try to change...if you try to get back on top of things. If you try again after a mistake, even several, it is merely a trip, not a fall.

I am working on it, so I have that going for me.

As far as my knee trouble, it surfaced after becoming unemployed recently. I took a walk/jog to clear my head and get out of the house and it ended up being the start of some pretty bad pain. I have gone to a general practitioner, orthopedist, had an x-ray and MRI, and now I am going to physical therapy to get it under control in addition to a followup with my ortho.

We will see how things go. From what I can deduce from the results of the MRI is that I do have some bursitis (water on the knee) and some other issues with bone-on-bone grinding in the joint.  Also, the options for healing range wildly from anti-inflammatories to surgery. One thing they mentioned is that losing weight would help with the problem.  I think that may be the cause of the issue.

I am not going to step on a scale...I feel like that was a good idea for me before because the weight is the problem, but the numbers are just numbers.  Focusing on every little change in weight, up or down, can get my mind focused on things that arent important.  Weight loss will come, just focus on what I need to be doing.

So. Plans are to get back on track with eating, get going back to my meetings and get back in the game. From there, knee recovery will follow along with general health and outlook.

Back to it.

Keep on walkin'

Back from a hiatus

Okay, so I am back.

Well, not so much back as I never left, I just have had some stuff going on that brought me down.

First up: I injured my knee.  For a while I was nursing it back to health and staying away from the gym, and that seemed to be going well....and then last week happened. I went for a walk in the morning and, feeling particularly adventurous, decided to jog a little bit just to test myself.  I did it, came home and then BAM. I was in a terrible amount of pain and it just kept getting worse. 

Doctor says that it could be tendonitis, but it could be other things too.  I can't do any exercise that puts any pressure on the knee. So that regulates me to swimming and biking.  Thankfully I have acquired a bike and that seems to be going well.  

Secondly, and perhaps more importantly: I am currently unemployed.  Mentally this has been challenging because my answer to pretty much everything, especially stress, anxiety and depression has been to eat.  I have, for the most part, been able to curb my tendencies and keep off of the danger foods.  It is a daily struggle, though, because now I am searching for a job at home by myself...all day....all week.  

Needless to say, it is a challenge. 

But I am doing things to make my own situation better.

First off, I am continuing to log my meals. Check.

Secondly, I am trying to stay away from the kitchen and not "graze." Check.

Also, due to obvious financial situations, I am not eating out. Check.

So, in short, things could be doing better, but they could be a heck of a lot worse.

I am continuing my walk, I am keeping my head up and staying with the program. Hell, I even got my 90 day chip in OA! That was a great reward for my hard work...next up - 6 months!

I will continue to post, I will continue to track, I will continue to make progress.

I will keep on walkin!

Vlog number 5

Vlog number 4

Vlog number 3

Endorphins are real, yo.

So I have been having a bit of a rough time lately.

Works been getting me down and I have been a tad depressed, anxious and grumpy lately.  That and very introverted.

Monday and Friday were/are different though.  Why?

Because I went to the gym.

I really didn't want to go, but I did. And my wife made me go this morning (all while she went back to bed and asked me to turn the lights out on my way. Thanks, honey).

Afterwords, after I cool off, get hydrated and take a shower, MAN, do I feel good.

More awake, more happy, positive and more.

I had a great morning and am going to push through and have a great day.

Also, at the gym, today was the first time that I looked in the mirror and noticed the change in my body.  

Sure, I have felt it. My clothes have been looser, I have gone down several notches in my belt and, as I have mentioned before, my seatbelt in the car isn't choking me out.

But today, I saw it. I saw that I am getting thinner and more muscular.  More importantly, I am getting healthier.

Have a great one, folks, and as always

Keep on walkin'

(And yes, I used a legally blonde gif. So sue me.)

Vlog Number 2